"You need to do everything possible to stand out or commit to fitting in. I'd say, just own your own sluttiness. Just own it."
- Emma Stone to New York Magazine
"So Mark Zuckerberg, the kid who created Facebook, was named Time Magazine's Person of the Year. He's 26... I would like to say, at 26 years old, I was passed out Wendy's drive-thru's. On foot."
- Emma Stone to New York Magazine
"$11 million. That sounds like a whole lotta vaginal activity."
- Tyrese in "Fast Five"
"Let's just say he's going to get a late night call from the STD clinic, confirming that his girlfriend is a whore with chlamydia"
- Laura Tokuza, 4/27/11
"You have to quit drinking for like, a month and a half, when you're pregnant."
- Tyrese in "Fast Five"
"Let's just say he's going to get a late night call from the STD clinic, confirming that his girlfriend is a whore with chlamydia"
- Laura Tokuza, 4/27/11
"You have to quit drinking for like, a month and a half, when you're pregnant."
- Chelsea Lately, 2/9/11
"Lindsay Lohan was released from rehab. And her mom, Dina Lohan, went to pick her up. So...that was mistake #1"
- Chelsea Lately, 1/4/11
"So Mark Zuckerberg, the kid who created Facebook, was named Time Magazine's Person of the Year. He's 26... I would like to say, at 26 years old, I was passed out Wendy's drive-thru's. On foot."
- Chelsea Lately, 12/15/10
Mr. Shu: I thought you hated the holidays.
Sue Sylvester: Nah, I just hate you.
- Glee, 12/7/10
Mr. Shu: Glee club needs you to be its ambassador.
Puck: More like its am-badass-ador.
- Glee, 11/30/10
Regarding relationships: "You either have to go balls to the wall or pull out completely."
- My apartment, 11/17/10
"Running for President is like having sex. Once you've experienced that, you can't just do it once."
- James Carville, CNN, 11/3/10
"Kurt: What are you going to be for Halloween?
Brittany: Oh, I'm going as a peanut allergy"
- Glee Rocky Horror Episode, 10/26/10
"Ambien and a half pint of vodka. This may be a mistake - especially because I've been trying to write this for the past 15 minutes."
- Blake Shelton via Twitter, 10/19/10
Random Ellen Fan: What have you learned as a Cover Girl?
Ellen Degeneres: So many things. Most importantly, I've learned that when the photographer says 'make love to the camera', it's just a figure of speech. Lesson learned." - Ellen, 10/14/10
"Grayson: Hey, I woke up one morning and my wife was gone. I know a little something about being left alone in an empty house.
Jules: At least you were left by someone who didn't love you anymore.
Grayson: That's sweet." - Cougar Town, 10/6/10"Friend: You gots no idea what I need honey.
Me: No, I think I have a pretty good sense. I, for example, need a hot cabana boy serving me a pina colada right now.
You need some Enya and low-dose Xanax." - 9/28/10"I never thought I'd be asking Cher to hold my meat purse" - Lady Gaga at the 2010 MTV VMA's, 9/12/10
"Well I better not be pregnant because if I am, it's Jesus" - Ann Conkle, 9/9/10
"Greg Proops: (about T.I. and Tiny’s drug bust) They should do what I do and give Paris Hilton my drugs to hold…
Arden Myrin: Ya know, maybe [T.I.] borrowed his car from the same person that Paris Hilton borrowed her purse from last weekend
Chelsea Handler: Paris Hilton’s trying to borrow someone’s career, that’s what she’s trying to do"
- Chelsea Lately, original air date: 9/2/10 (officially known as 9-0-2-1-0 day)
