Switching Teams

Credit: media.onsugar.com

There is a distinct possibility that my love for The Biebs is turning me into a lesbian.

While I pride myself on being Miss Gay America and understanding that gays and lesbians are "Born This Way", I do think I'm an exception in that I was born straight and am now considering alternative options.

Supporting evidence:

1. Miley Cyrus recently performed on Saturday Night Live and did an excellent impression of Justin Bieber (even I had to admit she was good, though she was clearly mocking him). What I also had to admit was that I was oddly attracted to Cyrus throughout the entire skit.
2. This girl looks so much like The Biebs that she wrote a song about it, which has since gone viral. And without sounding like a pedophile, I kind of dig her too.
3. Most of you are probably familiar with this #winner already -http://lesbianswholooklikejustinbieber.tumblr.com/. Yes, those are lesbians and yes, they look like a 17-and-one-month-year-old-young-man (my parole officer suggests that I don't refer to him as a "boy" to avoid jail time...)
4. I'm an avid fan of Showtime's lesbian drama "The L Word" (although that's been the case for years, even when I was engaged to a man)

As you can see, the evidence is staggering. Of course, I prefer the real thing over any female imposter as no one can truly croon "Somebody to Love" the way my Biebs does - although points go to the Glee cast for trying (video below).

But alas, I find myself considering the alternative more and more these days as female Bieber imposters keep popping up all over the grid. Soon, you'll find me at Tegan & Sara concerts wearing a T-shirt with Samantha Ronson's face on it. Or me on Samantha Ronson's face, whichever comes first.

I can't say that I'm even really bothered by the prospect. One of my best friends is a lesbian (hey Meggie!) and I've been hitting on her for years. Maybe I was Born This Way and didn't even realize it - it took Justin Bieber to help me accept who I am.  

Luckily, I'm close to West Hollywood and can make my team-switching declaration amongst peers.

If only Ellen were still single...